[IYFILWATIP] 3 — I Might Die Without You

Jade couldn’t control his temper and raised his voice indignantly. He appeared to be in a cycle of endless frustration.

“If you aren’t getting married, then why did you suddenly say something like that?”

“I’m old now.”

“So?”

“Money and power...if those two things I can’t attain, then I’d like to have honour.”

Money & power. Wasn’t that what every human desired? She thought Jade was an exception, but as the years passed, he too seemed to be more greedy. 

“If you want the commander position, I’ll put in a word for you,” she stated lightly.

Jade immediately snorted.

“It’s really funny that your Royal Highness can say something like that. No, after creating a skill-based knighthood, why would you break the culture you have meticulously curated by promoting based on family background and connections. No one will recognise me as the commander if you gave it to me, your highness.”

“That’s true, but…”

Kirona imagined what it would be like without Jade by her side. Immediately, her mood became dreary and sombre. The support holding her firmly had collapsed.

“Without you, who will protect me?”

“There are other knights, aren’t you staying in the palace for the time being? It’ll be fine.”

“I believe in you. Only.”

Hearing those words, Jade couldn’t hide his proud expression. Momentarily happy, he regained his composure after a while and continued.

“It is always an honour. But how about taking this opportunity to restore your trust in the world? There are many others who are devoted and loyal to your highness, besides me.”

“What if my new darling is an assassin?”

“Take care of the lovers you already have, and don’t have affairs with people until I come back. The cubs you have now have had their background thoroughly investigated and threatened enough. They can’t do that nonsense.”

Kirona reluctantly nodded. There wasn’t anyone who didn’t know how much of a bully Jade Eclipse acted towards Kirona’s lovers. Normally, she was keen to eat them, but when he was away, she was scared. As long as he assured her, it really was safe.

Now there was no excuse to hold on. Jade didn’t budge a single bit. He seemed to stand firm in his determination. In the end, Kirona even resorted to threatening him. She pointed to her rising bump, with a crestfallen face and a piteous appearance.

“I’m also having a baby. It’s going to be very difficult for me until I give birth, you know?”

Only then did Jade’s expression collapse. He extended his arm towards Kirona, holding out a note.

“Well, that’s what I’m most worried about.”

“...”

“Here, I’ve written down thirty five precautions to heed. I asked Emma for advice and wrote them down. Only the essentials, so you have to keep every single one of them.”

He took the paper back, and began reciting them one by one. 

“Not a single drop of alcohol. Forget about Emma saying a glass of wine is fine. I know its effect. One drink and you’re sure to run like an unbridled pony. Don’t even dream of giving it a drop. It’ll come back to bite you, and kill you. Secondly, I told Zelda to ensure you take your medicine twice a day. No skipping. Thirdly, don’t ride a horse until you are comfortable. Wait in the meantime. Fourthly, even if you don’t have an appetite, you must eat as much as the amount Marie gives…”

“Oh, stop nagging. I was wrong, I’d rather not have you by my side until the baby is born.”

Kirona rolled over, frustrated, and covered her ears. Jade was about to reply, but realised that Kirona was annoyed and kept his mouth shut. Kirona reluctantly accepted the note he handed to her. 

“...You really are going.”

“Yeah.”

Just as Jade knew Kirona, Kirona knew Jade. he was not motivated to do anything, and he was a person who rarely made decisions. But he was not a person who once decided, would go back on his words. Kirona sighed and rolled her eyes. 

“I might die without you.”

“It’s not going to happen.”

“No, it really is. You know I’ll die after one more fever.”

Kirona lay down and pretended to be exaggeratedly sick. It was an obvious fact. From some point on, Kirona became furious with anyone who denied it. Jade didn’t deny it. Instead, he promised. 

“...I will come before it is too late.”

“I told you not to swear falsely. I am sure I will die, but no one knows when I will die. But how do you know?”

“When have I ever been late? Whenever the princess needs me, I am there.”

 Kirona was speechless and stiff. Come to think of it, that was also the case. 

“...no, never.”

Jade grinned, as if he knew saying that would cause her to agree, and accepted her admission. He began to pamper her. His pampering was so soothing that Kirona became embarrassed. Suddenly, it dawned on her, how long she had had Jade by her side.

Five years. It was a long time.